Philandering Partners

Some people are not so blessed with a monogamous relationship and so are often stressed about their partner’s (possible) deception.  In a situation like this, (remember, woman) you are strong and can work through this adversity.  So, think about these first, before going driving yourself crazy.

Step One: Stay Calm. Yes, I know it’s impossible to stay calm after finding out that he’s been having an affair, but the best help is to confide in a friend.  Sharing your problem will lessen the weight you have on your shoulders. A friend can also give you sound advice that will guide you from distraught judgment.

Step Two: Find the root cause.  Your man is cheating for a reason (it could stress, doesn’t want to choose between you and her, etc.)  During this time, you have to clear your mind.  Be as objective as possible – then snoop around.  Find out important details about the other woman and their history (ex. How they met?)  Try to make links on how it all started and how far it’s gone since then.

If the main reason of his philandering is because he’s falling out of love with you, then skip Step Three and try to win him back by doing all the things that made him fall in love you the first time.  Always be there for him and be sensitive to his needs.  Give him attention and let him know that he is very special to you. But also make clear that a relationship should be balanced and that you won’t tolerate cheating.

Step Three: Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.  Try to get to know the other party a little better.  Find out as much as you can about her.  If you are ready to, talk to her.  You could pretend to be someone else if you can’t muster up all the courage to introduce the real you. Find out things about her and your partner.

Step Four: Talk to him.  Leave out the gory details about steps 1 to 3.  Just let him know that you know and let him decide whom he wants to be with.  A heart to heart talk always helps to clarify all those hazy thoughts clouding your mind.

If his decision is to leave you, then so be it.  It is much better than having him make a fool of you by being with another at the same time.  Always remember that you are a special girl and there will be a guy that is especially meant for you.

If his decision is to keep you both, then you might want to think of leaving him.  You don’t deserve second best, and do not stand for having to share him with someone else.

If his decision is to leave her, rejoice your triumph and make sure that this situation will never -ever- happen again.  Always keep an eye on him though, and perform non-routine check-ups on what he is doing. Though remember that a suspicious green eyed monster is not the way to stay on his good side. Free yourself from stress and tension and live happily ever after.