Today we received a letter from Thant that wanted to share with Asdfing, his personal story.
Lets try to help him by giving him a lot of answers; it is a difficult situation to be in love with your friend’s girlfriend…
At first I was thinking to start this letter with the following statement: “I am in love with my friend’s girlfriend.” Although that’s the point, it sounds very common; if I started that way, this wouldn’t be a confession; it would be unfair for her, for my friend and for me. All in all, if I just said that “I am in love with my friend’s girlfriend” who would believe that I am a guy that rates friendship very high?
However, that’s the truth. I think that friends are one the reasons life is worth living. As for the friend I am telling you about, I know him forever. We are best friends since the age of five. The only thing I can remember is 20 years full of fun, adventure, sadness, pain, support and great discussions. We used to play soccer together, we went at the same school, we used to study together to pass our exams, we went to college together; we found our previous jobs at the same time. And of course, when he wanted to introduce me his new girlfriend I had no reason to refuse. After all, every time any of us found a new flirt, he “desperately” needed the other one’s “approval”.
That’s how I met her. She and my buddy were having lunch in a local restaurant when they called me to join them. I wasn’t in a very good mood those days, however, when I first saw her it seemed like sun was shining again. I can swear that she is the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen in my life. I hadn’t realized that straight away. In our first discussion, all those things she was saying were like I could hear my thoughts in words.
The three of us used to hang out almost everyday. I was fascinated by her personality but that was it. One night, we were in a bar when my friend’s phone rung. They wanted him to go in his work. So, that was practically the first time we stayed alone; me and her. We finished our drinks, we took a long walk and we discussed. Nothing bothered me. I was amazingly happy after a long time. Till next morning.
As soon I was woke up the next morning all I could think about was her. And that feeling never left. At first I was smiling for no reason, I couldn’t wait to see her again but now it’s getting tiring. I started thinking that I might be in love with her but this love hurts me. So, here is the thing.
I know she is my soul mate or whatever they call it. There is connection between us; I can see it in her eyes. And I thing she might have feelings for me as well. We never talked about that, mostly because I didn’t want to bring it up.
As for my friend, we are like brothers. I can’t “steal” his girlfriend. I just feel guilty only because of the feeling I have for her. I know he likes her, but I am not sure they match perfectly. I can’t say for sure that she completes him as much as she completes me.
So, I have disappeared from their lives for a while. For a week or so, I am staying in my hometown and I don’t answer all their phone calls. I’ve told them that I am on vacation but the truth is that I am here to think of what I am going to do.
But all I can think so far is “Why did that happened to me? why I fell for the wrong girl? And, is there right and wrong when it comes to love?”
And I’d like to ask for your help. What I should do? Should I confess my love? Should I talk to her? Or, should I talk to my friend first? Or maybe shouldn’t I say anything and learn to live with that idea until I get over it?